Women are working hard. Too hard.
Fueled with vision and drive, women still fail. In droves.
While we might be among the most motivated in the room, we often don’t end up where we want to be because we’ve never learned the vital, internal, skill-set needed to manage the complex, and often biased, work and business environments we find ourselves in.
Lacking a solid foundation we think we’re imposters and out of our depth, and while we mentally fret we literally waste precious time spinning in endless loops of confusion about what to do next.
We suffer paralysis, or else exhaustion trying to check every box and cover our bases. And we work.
Often we work much harder than we have to in a bid to move things forward, hoping the direction will become clear at some point, and that all the effort will have mattered in the end. In short, we often flail.
What a missing internal skill-set looks like
Because the internal skill-set, the foundation of our powerful expression in the world, is internal, it’s not immediately obvious when it’s missing.
But make no mistake. If your internal skill-set’s weak, it will be reflected not only in the success of your work, but in your experience of your work - how much enjoyment you get from the work you do.
What I hear from women missing part - or all - of a healthy internal foundation:
“I’m exhausted from my work, like all the time. And I’m doing crazy amounts of things to change my situation.”
And then I say, “like what?”
And they look at me sort-of side-eyed, and then recount a truly impressive list of actions, from exercising, to changing their diet, to taking more vitamins, to getting more sleep. All good things. But not the right thing, and so they stay exhausted and overwhelmed.
OR I get this.
“I’ve really sacrificed for my career. Everything I do is tied to making Partner in two years - which matters because we’re thinking of starting a family. I’m checking all the boxes. Which worked in the beginning. But now, no matter what I do I can’t seem to get ahead.”
When I hear words like these I’m always moved by just how hard we, as women, are willing to throw down for what we want. The sacrifice, the effort, the resources.
It’s admirable, but something about it’s sad too. Because we’re all working really hard, like too hard, to get what we want.
OR I get this.
"I’m good at what I do, and unlike a lot of people I know I’m actually appreciated at work. But I keep feeling something’s missing. Like I could be doing something that’s a better fit and actually feels like it makes a difference. But I don’t know what that is, and to tell you the truth, I’m worried about rocking the boat. I’ve tried a few things to figure it out, but nothing’s really come of anything. Maybe I should just stop complaining. Am I complaining?”
Let me propose something.
What if the way you’ve been thinking about the problem’s been part of the problem all along? What if you’ve been squandering energy unnecessarily on things that won’t really fix what ails you?
Sure, getting targeted career skills and support toward your goals is often key to making real progress. But when you’ve been there and done that and you’re still unsure and dissatisfied, chances are you’re missing the real solution, the one right in front of you.
Here’s the plain truth. Every one of us would benefit from having the skills to know, really know, what’s right for us, and then the ability to live from that truth with conviction.
No matter where we are on the success trajectory, we might feel we’re not where we want to be, or in fact could be, but are not aware that our difficulty lies with something much deeper, with being intimately connected to what we want and need - and alternately, don’t want and can let go of.
And while the problem’s right in front of us, it often gets missed because our inability to understand, own and then act on who we truly are is not obvious. It’s not a problem we can touch.
So we skip right on to shoring up our credentials, or getting a new outfit or adjusting some regiment before we’d ever think of such a thing as working on our internal foundation, honing the skill-set attached to our authenticity and its expression in the world.
But here’s the thing.
Your ability to limit what you don’t want in life - what depletes you - and actively reach for what lights you up is a requirement for experiencing success and well-being. It will profoundly affect your quality and experience of the work you do, and the life you end up living.
This internal skill-set affects everything!
While the course I’ve developed to build up the internal skills of authenticity and expression focuses on your work and career goals, enhancing this skill-set will affect every area of your life.
These skills can:
Help you navigate the external world of uneven work opportunities with confidence, clarity and energy, but also:
Support you in knowing who you are and what you want, and then going for it
Build and support healthy self-esteem and confidence
Result in strong relationships in and out of the workplace
Allow you to leave what doesn’t work, and never did, behind. Really leave it behind so you can move freely forward
Your foundation goes with you wherever you go: into your work, relationships, family-life and even the conversations you have with yourself.
A robust inner skill-set then is the one thing with the capacity to change everything.
I’ve got you covered
I’ve gone deep, and I’ve gone wide in my search for what works to move women forward.
And while I currently advise high-performing women in business, I was a psychotherapist for twenty years before that, working with every variant of innovator, achiever, and many others on their way to their own version of success.
My online training brings these years of experience to you, that, and my enthusiasm and strategic knowledge of what works to empower women.
You can start now
While my Own Your Zone training will be offered Winter 2020, you can hold your spot now, and probably should. This is a pilot round of OYZ, and as such will have limited space for participants. I’m keeping things on the smaller side to allow for greater flexibility and increased opportunities to engage with me. Not only should this accelerate your work, but it will give me the feedback I need to evolve the program moving forward.
Click the button below to hold your spot, and to receive a copy of my Own Your Zone Info-graphic, a cheat-sheet preview of what’s in store.
You’ll also get my bi-monthly newsletter with insights and strategies for moving yourself toward your goals, as well as OYZ course updates.
Welcome to work with me. Welcome to Shine Lab!